What we've been up to this summer...

It's been too long since I've posted here. Walter will be SIX MONTHS OLD! I can't believe it. He is so incredibly sweet and handsome. I've been calling him pretty, but Walt is quick to correct me on that one. Anyway, he's been rolling over both ways now for several weeks and can sit up unassisted, but not for long. He's sweet, did I already say that? I can't stop kissing him. He completes the family and we're wild about him. He's also been sleeping through the night for a few months now. Amazing baby!

Isabella has been taking ballet and tumbling at the Green Hills School of Dance. She is absolutely in LOVE with dance class. She asks me every morning when she wakes up if we're going to dance class. She's crazy about her teacher "Mssss Dowwy" (Mrs. Dolly). So far she twirls in a circle, hops three times and does two summersaults. That's 5 weeks of training, but for a two year old I think it's pretty good.

I think some of the sweetest things Izzy has done lately is learning to say her bed time prayers. Here are some of my recent favorites.

Thank you Jesus for:
Funtimes
Popsicles
Big dog and Lila
Barbie House
Choochoo trains

While taking communion she reached up to the rector with the bread and said, "I want Jesus". Talk about out of the mouth of babes!

One night while tucking her in she was being particularly disobedient and I said, "Izzy, I'm not going to stay in her if you're going to be ugly to me. So, are you going to be a good girl or are you going to be ugly". She looked us square in the eyes, furrowed her brow and shouted, "UGGY"!

Unfortunately, at a young age she has somehow inherited her daddy's struggle with road rage. At anytime a car tries to pass me on the right she will lean forward in her car seat, point at the window and scream, "get back car, get back", the yell at me, "Go Mamma, cars go fast, Go Mamma"! I don't even know how on earth she knows to do this. It's crazy, Walt is a bit passive agressive on this issue, you can see it in his face glancing compulsively at the rear view mirrors and staying just fast enough not to let the person pass, but no pointing, no yelling. How does she know? Our car insurance is strained with one "aspiring race car driver" in the family, we can't have two.

Baby Shampoo and Sunshine...

It's mother's day. My first of having two children, of looking in the mirror and seeing a mother looking back. I wear it now like a coat, heavy but warm, hiding in it sometimes, but always glad to have it near.

I first noticed the Mom look in my hair. Once long and bleached blonde, it now swings softly at my jaw, not too short, a polite shade of brown. A few grays blend in with those fighting for youth, not ready to give. I am enjoying the experiences my thirties have brought me, and consider it a young and magical time. I only wish it weren't turning my hair gray, and carving lines around my eyes.

I'm exhausted, sleep deprived and missing out on pretty much everything in the world today, busy with poopie diapers, sippy cups, and "watcha doin mamma, watcha doin mamma, watcha doin mammas". I almost resented it…almost. The few weeks home with the first baby was kind of like standing in the street, waiting for a truck to run me over ten to fifteen times a day and then feeling obligated to count it a blessing, with a smile on my face and a lullaby on my lips.

But I do now, count it a blessing. The way Isabella's hair smells in the morning, like baby shampoo and sunshine. The way Walter's skin feels all bundled up in a towel after a bath. It hurts to put them to sleep, I know tomorrow they will be one day older; one step closer to dating and driving and graduating. That changes you, forever.

I see Mamma in most of me now, where it used to be something I read in magazines; searching for answers, hoping to get it right. It is who I am because two little sticky handed, runny nosed angels from heaven know it. I am the world to them and that is still hard to understand, but I feel it when I kiss a booboo or say a bedtime prayer. I see it in their eyes when they need someone to make it better. I am a Mother now, and always will be.

Super Mom

Two weeks ago I took my 2 year old and my 5 week old baby to the zoo...alone. Yes, I put the baby in the sling and packed a backpack with all the essentials. No stroller, no daddy, no worries. We had 4 hours of pure kid fun. We even ate grilled cheese sandwiches and tomato soup at the Zoofari cafe without a single power struggle, outburst or toddler tantrum. The baby slept quietly until we got back to the van. I quickly nursed him in the backseat and then we headed home.

I couldn't keep the smile off of my face. I wanted to tell all the mothers in the parking lot what I had accomplished. This is cake. I am a great mother. I am woman hear me roar. I can bring home the bacon and fry it up in a pan and go to the zoo with a nursing newborn and a high energy toddler. Bring it on.

Yesterday was warm and sunny and a perfect day for the zoo. We loaded up and headed out, but something was wrong already. Izzy was upset on the way over but I really couldn't figure out why. When we got out of the car she didn't want to hold my hand and I had to fight to keep her from running out into the parking lot alone. I put the baby in the sling and put the bag together and gasp...forgot the stroller. Oh well, we've been strollerless before but this time I had no backpack so we'd have to go without the essentials.

I handed Izzy her juice and we were off.We made it about 1/4 way into the zoo when she realized (to my horror) she had lost her juice. Juice is the most important thing to this little girl. It is not an option to be without it. I tried to make it so fun she would forget, $2 carousel ride, $3.50 hotdog with $2 souvenier cup and $2 giant pretzel that was dropped on the ground and wasted.

No, we will have to go back to the car and get more juice. By the time we got there the baby was hungry so we had to get in so I could nurse him quickly. Izzy drank her juice and we were off again.Well, no, she's hanging on to the back of the van crying "ride, ride, please mamma ride". She wants to ride in the stroller I forgot.

So, back we go for a $6 stroller rental. She's so excited about the new stroller she wants to push it. Yeah, that's really fun trying to keep her from knocking everyone in her path down.Now, we've been at the zoo 2 hours and haven't seen or done anything really. I am not however going to let this day be a bust. 2 trips to the diaper changing station, a pair of wet pants and one lost wallet later I give up.

Feeling defeated I pack the kids in the van and head back to the house.Along the way, as they both sleep quietly in their carseats I look in the rear view mirror at the most beautiful child I have ever seen. Her brown curls falling across those soft cheeks. I remember how lucky I am. I realize how lucky they are to have someone who loves them enough to take them to the zoo to begin with. I realize I am a supermom after all.

The Sweet Light

Do you know what the sweet light is? It’s the warm golden glow cast by the sun as it begins to set in the evening. It makes everything more perfect, serene and beautiful. It is the absolute most perfect time for taking photos. Unfortunately for me, I rarely have a camera in hand when the best opportunities present themselves. Instead, I keep those images in my heart and in my memory as long as I possibly can.

The first time I heard the term "sweet light" I was walking along a trail with my husband Walt. We had only been dating a short time, but I knew even then we’d grow old together. We were working as whitewater raft guides and both lived in rustic bungalows accessible only by a short trail through the woods. It was the end of a long, hard working and absolutely perfectly adventurous day and I was looking at him in that light. That glow that makes you feel like its a fairytale moment. The streaks of light dancing through the trees and bathing us in the warmth of the sun. I thought how lucky I was to really love someone who loves me as much in return. He started telling me about the sweet light and I thought, it is. It really is.

We were blessed with a beautiful 70 degree day this week. Walt met us at the nature center down the road from our house on his way home from work. I got there a few minutes early with Isabella and the baby, so we found a rocky spot along a creek where the water ran though like a tiny rapid. The soothing sound put the baby to sleep in the sling I wore him in so Izzy and I sat with our pants rolled up and our feet in the water. When daddy showed up he taught Isabella how to throw sticks in the water and watch them run the tiny rapid. That’s how you find the line. The line is how you would run a kayak through the water if it really was a giant rapid on a running river. It’s something he loved to do as a child and it filled Izzy with excitement.

Watching them, my little girl who has those same eyes as her Daddy, learning from him what he has always loved so much. Her knees were wet and muddy. She had dirt and leaves and who knows what else in her hair, her clothes and on her face. She was in that moment everything I wanted her to be. The light turned golden and warm and I watched them play in the water. I watched them laugh and grow and be themselves. I watched the sweet light once again kiss the day goodbye on a moment that I will try to hold onto forever.

Get Dora out of my coffee!

These days are flying by so fast it’s as if I’ve been transported through some sort of time travel. As a matter of fact, my father was explaining to me Einsteins theory of time travel. It’s fascinating really. If you travel at the speed of light you will actually be moving faster than time.


That’s kind of what it is like having two children. I wake to the sound of one of them crying but of course one wakes the other so really it will be two crying within a few minutes. I run as fast as humanly possible to one...diaper change, hugs, if it’s Izzy we’ve gotta bring pooh bear, eyore and dora along. Oh, mamma, go get blanket please. "Oranse" juice please mamma. Ok, here’s breakfast, here’s your friends, sit in your chair, watch sesame street while I go feed our baby. I walk around the house with the baby in one arm nursing him at the same time while I pour that very needed cup of coffee.


To me, the cup of coffee is like the oxygen mask that falls from the ceiling of an airplane. You know how they say if you have small children, in case of emergency place the mask on your face first so you will be able to care for the child. Well, that’s my coffee.


Isabella and I have shared a morning routine for a while now. We sit together in the recliner and watch Sesame Street. We talk about the ABCs and 123s and eat our oatmeal. It’s been pretty hard lately to make time to do that with a newborn around and all. Everytime he starts to cry she holds on to my arm, leg or hand. Anything she can get a good grip on. It breaks my heart for her to be left out so much these days.


This morning the baby slept late and she got her time with mama. We also had to let Dora the Explorer sit with us. She is crazy about Dora in a way that is almost frightening. She talks about Dora and her friends Boots, backpack and map. If you have a small child you know EXACTLY what I am talking about. You also realize how scandalous marketers are. Cereal boxes, cookies, yogurt, candy, crackers, everything at the grocery store with Dora is down at her eye level. Please mama, dora. No...you don’t need neon colored fruit snacks saturated in sugar. But mama, it has Dora on it.


This morning she thought it would be great to put dora in my coffee. There she was, my biggest competition in my oxygen mask. I’d like to meet the person who came up with this Dora thing. She’s not quite as obnoxious as Barney or Blue’s Clues, and Izzy is becoming bilingual a bit. Is it green or is it verde? Hello or Ola? Who knows. I don’t care as long as she stays out of my "mamma juice".

Week 7

I can't believe that 7 weeks have passed so quickly. We are flying through the newborn stage at warp speed. It has been both torturous and magical at every turn. I'll get to that later.

First, I have to tell you about this photo to the left. Izzy is wearing my recital costume from when I took ballet as a little girl. In case you can't tell, it's a poodle. She is starting ballet this summer at Green Hills School of Dance. I have already stocked up on adorable leotards and tights. Her nana bought her a ballet box like the one I had and loved. I think when I go to have her fitted for her little shoes I will melt into the floor with joy.

In this photo she is modeling one of her Mama Lena's beautiful dresses.
Izzy looking adorable after playing in the "no". That's how she says snow. Soooo cute.

She's talking like crazy now. Here are some of her new words and phrases:

We did it! (eedidit)

Rooray! (hooray)

Git back doggies

Tanks (thanks)

Urry (hurry)

Rorange Juice (orange)

Wawa Juice (apple)

Mee-ulk (Milk)

Nacks (snacks)

So, how are we doing? If you are interested. Things have been wonderful. The baby sleeps pretty well. Last night he only woke once to feed at around 3:30 and went right back to sleep until 8:00 am. I can live with that! He does however, have acid reflux so there's a lot of crying and straining after he eats. It's hard to watch him in pain. I've been told baby acid is more painful than what an adult experiences. If you've ever had it you know how bad it can be. I wish I could make it go away. I stand in the bathroom with the exhaust fan running until he calms down or falls asleep. We've found that the carseat is the best place for him to sleep right now because it keeps him upright.

I'm feeling great. I've started back to the gym and am anxious to get these baby pounds off. I recovered well from the ceaserean, but unfortunately my body is reacting to the sutures that were used to close the incision. I have 6-8 weeks to give it a chance to heal itself before needing plastic surgery. I'm wondering if they could throw in a tummy tuck while they're there?

Well, as I speak both babies are asleep and have been for over an hour. God is smiling down. I must have done something right. Maybe I'll sleep myself. Take Care.