Kanuga '08

Baby Walter was baptized this week while we were vacationing at Kanuga in the mountains of NC. It is a beautiful place and it was very special to spend it with family. We had a great time and it feels so good to go back every year.

Below is a photo of Salena with baby Walter in the Chrisening gown she made herself. It was so beautiful, hopefully I can take a picture of the gown to post here so you can see the details.

She loves to play the piano!

My parents with Baby Walter

Uncle Lee and Baby Kai

Walt's family on the porch swing at our cabin

She's really growing up...and she loved pushing Deepaw into the lake...over and over again. thanks Deepaw!

We got to take the kids to visit some of our very most favorite friends in the world, the Worley's. We miss them so much, but see them every summer. Izzy loved seeing all the horses, donkeys and cows. It is so beautiful there.

The kids have been going swimming at our YMCA pool a lot this summer and loving it! Izzy is getting so brave, she goes down the slide by herself and loves to jump in. She has no fear of the water, but we're teaching her how to climb out of the pool by herself to keep her safe. I think she'll be swimming unassisted in no time. She has a great doggie paddle!

Mommy Time...

Every girl needs a little girl time and every mommy must find the opportunity to remain her own person. When Izzy was 6 months old I went for a girl trip to NYC, so not to break up the tradition, I headed for Florida when Walter turned 6 months!

It was such a wonderful trip...I had my own room and bathroom. Showers all day as long as I wished and sleeping late. We stayed up late watching Sex and the city episodes back to back and ate...a lot. I missed the kids and Walt of course, but it was a perfect and very much needed break.

What we've been up to this summer...

It's been too long since I've posted here. Walter will be SIX MONTHS OLD! I can't believe it. He is so incredibly sweet and handsome. I've been calling him pretty, but Walt is quick to correct me on that one. Anyway, he's been rolling over both ways now for several weeks and can sit up unassisted, but not for long. He's sweet, did I already say that? I can't stop kissing him. He completes the family and we're wild about him. He's also been sleeping through the night for a few months now. Amazing baby!

Isabella has been taking ballet and tumbling at the Green Hills School of Dance. She is absolutely in LOVE with dance class. She asks me every morning when she wakes up if we're going to dance class. She's crazy about her teacher "Mssss Dowwy" (Mrs. Dolly). So far she twirls in a circle, hops three times and does two summersaults. That's 5 weeks of training, but for a two year old I think it's pretty good.

I think some of the sweetest things Izzy has done lately is learning to say her bed time prayers. Here are some of my recent favorites.

Thank you Jesus for:
Funtimes
Popsicles
Big dog and Lila
Barbie House
Choochoo trains

While taking communion she reached up to the rector with the bread and said, "I want Jesus". Talk about out of the mouth of babes!

One night while tucking her in she was being particularly disobedient and I said, "Izzy, I'm not going to stay in her if you're going to be ugly to me. So, are you going to be a good girl or are you going to be ugly". She looked us square in the eyes, furrowed her brow and shouted, "UGGY"!

Unfortunately, at a young age she has somehow inherited her daddy's struggle with road rage. At anytime a car tries to pass me on the right she will lean forward in her car seat, point at the window and scream, "get back car, get back", the yell at me, "Go Mamma, cars go fast, Go Mamma"! I don't even know how on earth she knows to do this. It's crazy, Walt is a bit passive agressive on this issue, you can see it in his face glancing compulsively at the rear view mirrors and staying just fast enough not to let the person pass, but no pointing, no yelling. How does she know? Our car insurance is strained with one "aspiring race car driver" in the family, we can't have two.

Baby Shampoo and Sunshine...

It's mother's day. My first of having two children, of looking in the mirror and seeing a mother looking back. I wear it now like a coat, heavy but warm, hiding in it sometimes, but always glad to have it near.

I first noticed the Mom look in my hair. Once long and bleached blonde, it now swings softly at my jaw, not too short, a polite shade of brown. A few grays blend in with those fighting for youth, not ready to give. I am enjoying the experiences my thirties have brought me, and consider it a young and magical time. I only wish it weren't turning my hair gray, and carving lines around my eyes.

I'm exhausted, sleep deprived and missing out on pretty much everything in the world today, busy with poopie diapers, sippy cups, and "watcha doin mamma, watcha doin mamma, watcha doin mammas". I almost resented it…almost. The few weeks home with the first baby was kind of like standing in the street, waiting for a truck to run me over ten to fifteen times a day and then feeling obligated to count it a blessing, with a smile on my face and a lullaby on my lips.

But I do now, count it a blessing. The way Isabella's hair smells in the morning, like baby shampoo and sunshine. The way Walter's skin feels all bundled up in a towel after a bath. It hurts to put them to sleep, I know tomorrow they will be one day older; one step closer to dating and driving and graduating. That changes you, forever.

I see Mamma in most of me now, where it used to be something I read in magazines; searching for answers, hoping to get it right. It is who I am because two little sticky handed, runny nosed angels from heaven know it. I am the world to them and that is still hard to understand, but I feel it when I kiss a booboo or say a bedtime prayer. I see it in their eyes when they need someone to make it better. I am a Mother now, and always will be.

Super Mom

Two weeks ago I took my 2 year old and my 5 week old baby to the zoo...alone. Yes, I put the baby in the sling and packed a backpack with all the essentials. No stroller, no daddy, no worries. We had 4 hours of pure kid fun. We even ate grilled cheese sandwiches and tomato soup at the Zoofari cafe without a single power struggle, outburst or toddler tantrum. The baby slept quietly until we got back to the van. I quickly nursed him in the backseat and then we headed home.

I couldn't keep the smile off of my face. I wanted to tell all the mothers in the parking lot what I had accomplished. This is cake. I am a great mother. I am woman hear me roar. I can bring home the bacon and fry it up in a pan and go to the zoo with a nursing newborn and a high energy toddler. Bring it on.

Yesterday was warm and sunny and a perfect day for the zoo. We loaded up and headed out, but something was wrong already. Izzy was upset on the way over but I really couldn't figure out why. When we got out of the car she didn't want to hold my hand and I had to fight to keep her from running out into the parking lot alone. I put the baby in the sling and put the bag together and gasp...forgot the stroller. Oh well, we've been strollerless before but this time I had no backpack so we'd have to go without the essentials.

I handed Izzy her juice and we were off.We made it about 1/4 way into the zoo when she realized (to my horror) she had lost her juice. Juice is the most important thing to this little girl. It is not an option to be without it. I tried to make it so fun she would forget, $2 carousel ride, $3.50 hotdog with $2 souvenier cup and $2 giant pretzel that was dropped on the ground and wasted.

No, we will have to go back to the car and get more juice. By the time we got there the baby was hungry so we had to get in so I could nurse him quickly. Izzy drank her juice and we were off again.Well, no, she's hanging on to the back of the van crying "ride, ride, please mamma ride". She wants to ride in the stroller I forgot.

So, back we go for a $6 stroller rental. She's so excited about the new stroller she wants to push it. Yeah, that's really fun trying to keep her from knocking everyone in her path down.Now, we've been at the zoo 2 hours and haven't seen or done anything really. I am not however going to let this day be a bust. 2 trips to the diaper changing station, a pair of wet pants and one lost wallet later I give up.

Feeling defeated I pack the kids in the van and head back to the house.Along the way, as they both sleep quietly in their carseats I look in the rear view mirror at the most beautiful child I have ever seen. Her brown curls falling across those soft cheeks. I remember how lucky I am. I realize how lucky they are to have someone who loves them enough to take them to the zoo to begin with. I realize I am a supermom after all.

The Sweet Light

Do you know what the sweet light is? It’s the warm golden glow cast by the sun as it begins to set in the evening. It makes everything more perfect, serene and beautiful. It is the absolute most perfect time for taking photos. Unfortunately for me, I rarely have a camera in hand when the best opportunities present themselves. Instead, I keep those images in my heart and in my memory as long as I possibly can.

The first time I heard the term "sweet light" I was walking along a trail with my husband Walt. We had only been dating a short time, but I knew even then we’d grow old together. We were working as whitewater raft guides and both lived in rustic bungalows accessible only by a short trail through the woods. It was the end of a long, hard working and absolutely perfectly adventurous day and I was looking at him in that light. That glow that makes you feel like its a fairytale moment. The streaks of light dancing through the trees and bathing us in the warmth of the sun. I thought how lucky I was to really love someone who loves me as much in return. He started telling me about the sweet light and I thought, it is. It really is.

We were blessed with a beautiful 70 degree day this week. Walt met us at the nature center down the road from our house on his way home from work. I got there a few minutes early with Isabella and the baby, so we found a rocky spot along a creek where the water ran though like a tiny rapid. The soothing sound put the baby to sleep in the sling I wore him in so Izzy and I sat with our pants rolled up and our feet in the water. When daddy showed up he taught Isabella how to throw sticks in the water and watch them run the tiny rapid. That’s how you find the line. The line is how you would run a kayak through the water if it really was a giant rapid on a running river. It’s something he loved to do as a child and it filled Izzy with excitement.

Watching them, my little girl who has those same eyes as her Daddy, learning from him what he has always loved so much. Her knees were wet and muddy. She had dirt and leaves and who knows what else in her hair, her clothes and on her face. She was in that moment everything I wanted her to be. The light turned golden and warm and I watched them play in the water. I watched them laugh and grow and be themselves. I watched the sweet light once again kiss the day goodbye on a moment that I will try to hold onto forever.